ANGER
ESSAY
A. You have to create a Weebly account if you haven't already created one.
B. You have to write an essay with at least three paragraphs of at least five sentences each. All the answers of questions C-G should be answered in your essay.
C. The first paragraph should describe what is anger and what is anger management?(Give examples)
F. The second paragraph should describe at least 3 techniques you can you use to control your anger and how to keep anger at bay.
G. The last paragraph should be about stating when a person needs counseling for anger management and at least two things you do to control your anger.
B. You have to write an essay with at least three paragraphs of at least five sentences each. All the answers of questions C-G should be answered in your essay.
C. The first paragraph should describe what is anger and what is anger management?(Give examples)
F. The second paragraph should describe at least 3 techniques you can you use to control your anger and how to keep anger at bay.
G. The last paragraph should be about stating when a person needs counseling for anger management and at least two things you do to control your anger.
Everyone knows what it feels like to be angry. Yet the causes, effects and ways to control anger are sometimes not well understood. Psychologists can help people recognize and avoid anger triggers. They also can provide ways to deal with anger when it does occur.
Anger-expert psychologist Howard Kassinove, PhD, answers the following questions about anger:
What is anger and how does it differ from aggression?
Anger is a negative feeling state that is typically associated with hostile thoughts, physiological arousal and maladaptive behaviors. It usually develops in response to the unwanted actions of another person who is perceived to be disrespectful, demeaning, threatening or neglectful. Anger involves certain styles of thinking such as, “My boss criticized me in front of my colleagues. Now, I’m fuming. He shouldn’t be so disrespectful!”or “That woman in front of me is driving so slowly. This is exasperating. She shouldn’t be allowed to drive on the freeway!” Anger energizes us to retaliate. Our data indicate that about 25 percent of anger incidents involve thoughts of revenge such as, “I’m going to spread rumors about my boss to get even,” or “I’d like to just bump her car to put her in her place.” Interestingly, anger usually emerges from interactions with people we like or love, such as children, spouses and close friends.
Angry thoughts may be accompanied by muscle tension, headaches or an increased heart rate. In addition, the verbal and physical expressions of anger may serve as a warning to others about our displeasure. The verbal expressions include yelling, arguing, cursing and sarcasm. However, anger can also be expressed physically by raising a clenched fist, throwing a book on the floor, breaking a pencil or hitting a wall. Sometimes, anger is not expressed externally but remains as internal rumination.
Aggression, in contrast, refers to intentional behavior that aims to harm another person. Often, it reflects a desire for dominance and control. In the cases I see in my clinical and research work, weapons are often involved. Aggression can be shown by punching, shoving, hitting or even maiming another person, and it can occur in marital violence, child or elder abuse, bullying or gang and criminal activities.
Since anger is typically expressed only through loud verbalizations, it is the cases of aggression that wind up in the criminal justice system. Our research shows that about 90 percent of aggressive incidents are preceded by anger. However, only 10 percent of anger experiences are actually followed by aggression. People often want to act aggressively when angry but, fortunately, most do not actually take aggressive actions. Also, there is sometimes an impulse to engage in problem solving behaviors when angry.
Yet, anger is an important problem in its own right with negative consequences in many aspects of life such as marriages, the workplace, parent-child interactions and driving behavior. Anger is associated with interpersonal conflicts, negative evaluations by others, erratic driving, property destruction, occupational maladjustment, inappropriate risk taking, accidents, substance abuse and so-called crimes of passion.
Anger-expert psychologist Howard Kassinove, PhD, answers the following questions about anger:
What is anger and how does it differ from aggression?
Anger is a negative feeling state that is typically associated with hostile thoughts, physiological arousal and maladaptive behaviors. It usually develops in response to the unwanted actions of another person who is perceived to be disrespectful, demeaning, threatening or neglectful. Anger involves certain styles of thinking such as, “My boss criticized me in front of my colleagues. Now, I’m fuming. He shouldn’t be so disrespectful!”or “That woman in front of me is driving so slowly. This is exasperating. She shouldn’t be allowed to drive on the freeway!” Anger energizes us to retaliate. Our data indicate that about 25 percent of anger incidents involve thoughts of revenge such as, “I’m going to spread rumors about my boss to get even,” or “I’d like to just bump her car to put her in her place.” Interestingly, anger usually emerges from interactions with people we like or love, such as children, spouses and close friends.
Angry thoughts may be accompanied by muscle tension, headaches or an increased heart rate. In addition, the verbal and physical expressions of anger may serve as a warning to others about our displeasure. The verbal expressions include yelling, arguing, cursing and sarcasm. However, anger can also be expressed physically by raising a clenched fist, throwing a book on the floor, breaking a pencil or hitting a wall. Sometimes, anger is not expressed externally but remains as internal rumination.
Aggression, in contrast, refers to intentional behavior that aims to harm another person. Often, it reflects a desire for dominance and control. In the cases I see in my clinical and research work, weapons are often involved. Aggression can be shown by punching, shoving, hitting or even maiming another person, and it can occur in marital violence, child or elder abuse, bullying or gang and criminal activities.
Since anger is typically expressed only through loud verbalizations, it is the cases of aggression that wind up in the criminal justice system. Our research shows that about 90 percent of aggressive incidents are preceded by anger. However, only 10 percent of anger experiences are actually followed by aggression. People often want to act aggressively when angry but, fortunately, most do not actually take aggressive actions. Also, there is sometimes an impulse to engage in problem solving behaviors when angry.
Yet, anger is an important problem in its own right with negative consequences in many aspects of life such as marriages, the workplace, parent-child interactions and driving behavior. Anger is associated with interpersonal conflicts, negative evaluations by others, erratic driving, property destruction, occupational maladjustment, inappropriate risk taking, accidents, substance abuse and so-called crimes of passion.
JAPANESE METHOD TO RELAX IN 5 MINUTES
11 QUOTES TO REMEMBER WHEN YOU'RE FEEL ANGRY
1. Every day you must unlearn the ways that hold you back. You must rid yourself of negativity, so you can learn to fly. – Leon Brown
Even if your day begins in a way that makes you frustrated and overwhelmed, remember to take a few deep breaths, center yourself, and remember your intentions for the day. You don’t have the power to control every single thing that happens to you, but you can control how you react to it and what type of energy you will bring into each moment.
Even if your day begins in a way that makes you frustrated and overwhelmed, remember to take a few deep breaths, center yourself, and remember your intentions for the day. You don’t have the power to control every single thing that happens to you, but you can control how you react to it and what type of energy you will bring into each moment.
2. I knew I matured when I realized every situation doesn’t need a reaction, sometimes you just have to leave people to do the things they do. You don’t have to give everything in life a reaction. Sometimes the best thing to do is stay silent and walk away. Not much is worth getting angry over, so remember that you have the power to choose how you will react, and you have a limited amount of energy. Don’t waste it on things and people that don’t really matter in the end.
3. A couple of years from now, everything you’re stressing about won’t even matter. Keep moving forward. What matters so much now will seem insignificant down the road. Don’t overreact or put too much emphasis on the little things. Look at the bigger picture, enjoy life, and don’t take the ride too seriously.
4. Put your focus into loving and creating, not gossip and hating. So much unnecessary hatred and animosity flows rampantly in society, and it doesn’t have to. We can create the world we wish, so if we want a more loving, compassionate world, we must do away with uncalled for anger and low vibrational conversations.
5. Do not get upset with people or situations. Both are powerless without your reaction. Your reaction basically allows a situation to unfold in a certain manner. Therefore, by not giving your energy to people and things that don’t require it, you can conserve that energy for things that truly matter to you. Being upset only means that you have given up your power to others and will allow people to control your emotions. Always remember that you have ultimate governance over your own emotions, and you don’t have to let others get under your skin.
6. Sometimes…you have to let go to allow better things to come into your life. Sometimes a closed door only means that better things are on their way from another direction. You have to eventually let go of what no longer serves you in order to attract what will serve the evolution of your consciousness in the best way.
7. The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present. Holding onto the past will only delay the gifts you can receive in the present and the blessings that await you in the future. The past serves a purpose, but it can only teach you if you apply those lessons to the present and the future. Dwelling in the past won’t allow you to move on, and it will keep you in a state of constant frustration and anger.
8. I don’t get mad anymore. I just accept it for what it is and move on. Anger only hurts you in the end, so remember that you have the ultimate power to either accept it and learn a lesson from it, or to hold it in and allow the event or person to control you. We cannot control what happens in this world, but we can control how we respond to it.
9. Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Like we’ve said already, anger only hurts you in the end. Don’t hold onto emotions that drain you mentally, physically, and emotionally. Allow the anger to pass through you, feel it fully, and release it so that you may move on and not hold onto harmful energy.
10. You can come out bitter or you can come out better. There is purpose in your pain. Always remember that anger serves a purpose that we may not always have awareness of. Either the anger exists to show you a new perspective, move on, or realize something within you that you still need to work on. However, all of these reasons have a purpose, and it will get better in time.
10 THINGS TO NEVER DO WHEN YOU'RE ANGRY
“When angry, count to ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred,” ~ Thomas Jefferson
When we are angry, more than our mood is affected. It can influence our decisions, our actions and our ability to do simple things. It’s probably obvious that we don’t want anger to be the driving force behind our choices, yet that’s what we tend to do. What’s more, our anger doesn’t just impact us, it impacts everyone around us, creating a ripple effect.
We have three choices when it comes to dealing with our anger. We can:
Hide it
Express it
Let it go
And while we’re working through our anger, it’s important to approach it the right way. That means stepping back from some of our daily routines and rethinking our approach.
1. Hide it.Hiding our anger is often encouraged and is certainly easier than dealing with it. The evidence, however, says that hiding anger can affect our health. studies show that holding on to anger can increase the risk of heart disease and impact our overall health. Just because hiding it is bad, doesn’t mean you should put your anger on display. Instead of reacting in the moment, find a way to work through your anger respectfully and thoughtfully.
2. Go to sleep while you’re still angry.To be thoughtful in our response to a heated situation, we may think “sleeping on it” is a good strategy. Well, it seems the age-old advice of “never going to be angry” is what’s best. Going to sleep with the feelings of anger burning strong will only reinforce those feelings making them even more pronounced in the morning.
3. Go for a drive.Choose to travel on foot and stay out of the car whenever you can. When we are in a state of anger, our ability to focus and concentrate is diminished, which could lead to poor judgment on the roadways. The plus side of walking is that any form of physical exercise is a good approach to dealing with anger.
4. Shout it from the rooftops.We all need to vent from time to time, but it might not be having a positive effect. “Venting may make you feel different at the moment, but the change in an emotional state doesn’t necessarily feel better; it may just feel less bad,” says University of Arkansas psychology professor, Jeffrey Lohr. Venting may make us feel better, but it isn’t addressing the problem.
5. Keep arguing.When we are angry, it’s hard to present our side of the story with rational and thoughtful points. We often result in saying things we’ll regret down the road. Listen and then allow yourself to take leave of the argument to process the event. Leaving the argument doesn’t mean it’s over. It’s important that we prepare ourselves to revisit it with the right intentions and in a better frame of mind.
6. Air your grievances on social media.When we post our arguments on social media, we can’t take them back. Just like arguing in the heat of the moment can lead to regret, so can posting on Facebook. Yes, you can delete it, but once it’s out there, it’s out there.
7. Email the person you’re angry at.Much like posting on social media, you can’t take back an email that has been sent. While writing and journaling are great ways of dealing and processing anger, sending those thoughts are a bad idea. Write the email and then delete or save it. Whatever we do, we shouldn’t send it. We can always revisit the email once our emotions are under control.
8. Resort to drugs and/or alcohol.Alcohol is a depressant, and adding a depressant into a depressing mood is a recipe for disaster. Alcohol impedes our judgment and lowers our natural restraint mechanisms that prevent us from doing dumb things. This state of mind can lead to doing and saying things will come back to haunt us.
9. Dwell on it.When we dwell on something that made us angry, it can often end up spiraling out of control. Overthinking the situation can lead to blowing it out of proportion and creating more points of contention than exist. Instead of dwelling on the situation, try having a direct and respectful conversation with the person involved.
10. Reach for food.
Emotional eating is never good. When we are in the midst of a crisis, we aren’t usually reaching for carrot sticks. Instead, we find ourselves reaching for foods that bring us comfort. Eating poorly during an emotional state can lead to a compromised immune system. Eating mindfully is never more important than when we are dealing with anger.